Welcome to a glossary for understanding kink activities, featuring a diverse array of terms and definitions.

Age Play

Age play is an activity where participants act out a different age than their actual age. The most common form of age play is regression, where the said person acts much younger than their actual age. Age play can take many forms, including things like Adult Baby Diaper Lovers (ABDL). An age play dynamic usually involves a Caregiver (CG), but not necessarily in the form of a Daddy or Mommy role. A person who is playing as a younger individual may be called a little, baby, or baby(boy/girl). However, pet names are also acceptable to use. Age play can include sexual elements, or it can be completely non-sexual.

Age Regression

Typically refers to mentally regressing in age. There is a non-kink side to this which is often specifically referred to as agere. Within kink it is usually as part of role play involving Adult babies / Diaper Lovers (ABDL) or ageplay, but not always.

The non-kink version of age regression is a coping mechanism that is approved by therapists. Sometimes it may even looks like ABDL (diapers, onesies, stuffies, etc) but there is an important difference, as the non-kink version is entirely nonsexual / non-kink and typically the one regressing is actually in (or close to) the mindset of a real child/toddler/etc rather than role playing.

Bastinado

A form of Impact play where the feet or, more specifically, the soles of the feet are tortured. Sometimes also referred to as foot-torture, Foot whipping or falanga/falaka. This is commonly done with canes, but other stick, paddle or flogger like implements are also used.

Origins – Evolved in different areas it has been found in writings in Europe 1537 as the word “Bastinado”, but in 960 it was already had a written description in China

Blood Play

Forms of play that results in blood being drawn from the body and has enjoyment or fetisization of the blood itself. In some cases fake blood or blood of animals is used to achieve a similar effect.

For many the sight, smell and feel of blood can be a fear inducing situation, resulting in added adrenaline and other brain chemicals altering the mental play state. In some cases play can also be ritualistic in nature where the blood has additional meaning and purpose for the participant(s) of a scene or dynamic. What blood means to people differs a lot, so many different sub-forms of play exist.

It is closely related to knife play, needle play, and hooking. But also has looser connections with impact play using items like a vampire glove or a meat hammer. Certain kinds of whips are also sometimes used to draw blood. In other instances people will use the time while a person is menstruating to have sexual interaction and enjoy this kind of connection with them and their blood.

Knife, needle and hooking – All of these kinks can involve the piercing of the skin in a controlled manner.

In knife play this may include scar carving or scarification as an artistic expression. But also general play with sharp knives can result in light cuts with blood that is controlled, where blood comes from a specific space where the body can easily heal and the resulting blood can have an intense mental effect.

Needle play can be both artistic and fear inducing. The blood that comes out after a needle is removed can be considered a form of blood play. In some cases people will purposefully use areas of the body that are well circulated to create a large release of blood on removal of the needle. This happens often in the facial areas.

Hooking may be artistic or it can also be used to restrain as people are literally hooked using meat hooks through the skin. In more extreme case there are people suspended in the air from larger hooks. On removal, blood is likely to come out of the areas that the person has been hooked on.

In some cases barbed wire is also used as a restraint, potentially resulting in blood.

Impact play – In impact play the blood play can revolve around using different kinds of impact toys that could break the skin. This can include things like vampire gloves that have small spikes that pierce the skin on impact or whips with attachments made for opening up the skin. Other impact toys that can break the skin enough to produce blood are:

• single tail whips
• chains
• asphalt gloves
• curry combs
• vampire gloves & vampire paddles
• Every day objects used as toys like barbed wire or meat hammers (as these are not made to be toys they can come with increased risks).

Period Play – Enjoying sexual activities when a person is menstruating can be blood play, particularly when blood is an addition to the scene. The blood can be seen as a trophy, but others may use it to make it extra “dirty”. This is however very personal to people’s preferences as menstruating is a natural part of the human experience and some folks simply enjoying being with their partner during this time.

Risks – Due to the nature of blood, the risk of contamination to the person bleeding is a factor. Any item piercing the skin through to a lower layer should be properly sterilised (which is different to disinfection). Anatomy and placement should also be thought carefully about to avoid blood vessels, nerves or other important structures like saliva glands. A lot of precautions are needed to make sure that contamination does not happen. Blood borne pathogens are also a risk to the person piercing the skin. Blood from another person can transfer STIs / STDs, but also blood type differences in certain quantities can cause the recipient to become sick. ‘Blood binding’ or becoming ‘blood bound’ is a phrase often used to describe when tools and toys have come into contact with a person’s blood. Since objects are often porous there is often no way to sterilise them, so blood that has penetrated a toy could be transferred to another person. To prevent this a toy or tool is declared ‘blood bound’ to that person and is only used on that person in future. This is not something to be done without extensive consent. For example: Commonly you will see meat hammers made out of wood and considered “blood bound” to a person once their blood has been on the hammer. Note that many of these tools are fairly cheap and giving them to a person who’s blood is on them is considered a normal thing to do.

Bondage

One of the core principles of BDSM as paired with Discipline. The B in BDSM stands for Bondage.

A type of play that has the goal to restrain a person. This can be achieved in many different ways, using different forms and in different dynamics. These differences produce different results that can range from feeling like a cosy blanket all the way to being extremely restrictive and challenging.

Bondage can include many of the forms listed below but also may include the use of certain furniture, posture clothing, and restraints designed to restrict movement.

Breath play

Play that reduces the ability of a participant to breathe or restricts blood flow to the head to achieve a similar effect. Sometimes referred to as ‘smothering’ when it is achieved by an object or body part being placed over the mouth and / or nose.

Application of this can be done by:

• hand such as using choke holds, holding a hand over their mouth or placing pressure on their neck.
• body parts pressed over the mouth and nose, such as armpits, ass, or breasts.
• using rope around the neck or chest in rope bondage forms that restrict breath (and potentially blood flow).
• using a mask to make it harder for the person to get fresh air, or restrict air completely and have them re-breathe their own breaths.
• using other materials around the neck or face to induce the feeling of choking or suffocation.

Caution – This is considered edge-play and has extreme consequences when it goes wrong. Even experienced practitioners can have potentially fatal accidents so it is strongly advised that you are deeply educated and aware of the risks before attempting this play.

Chastity

This is abstinence from certain sexual activity enforced through equipment (chastity belts or cages) that confine and restrict access to and use of the wearer’s genitals. Equipment is available for all genital types.

This equipment is often locked, and so a Top role in this activity is called a Key Holder.

The main symbolic purpose of chastity is to humble the wearer through loss of agency over their sexual activities. The main effect of chastity on the wearer is to increase sexual frustration which can affect sexual and power dynamics (e.g. through increased arousal levels and attention).

In chastity enclosing the penis and genital confinement is often linked with symbolic/attempted shrinking of the penis (see penis shrinking).

Cock & Ball Torture

Cock and Ball Torture centers around inflicting pain and punishment on the male genitalia, including the penis, scrotum, and/or testicles. Depending on context, this might be given by Top role such as a Castrator / Castratrix, or by a Sadist.

Cock and Ball Torture is commonly abbreviated as CBT, which shouldn’t be mistaken for cognitive behavioral therapy which is also often abbreviated as the same letters. While Cock And Ball Torture can change male behavior in a play setting it is not considered a standard therapeutic technique! However, it could be said that there is still some psychology involved in Cock And Ball Torture as it runs to the core of the male psyche to have pain inflicted upon such a anatomically sensitive and vulnerable place like the cock and balls.

Receiving CBT is generally viewed as a masochistic activity which often is submissive. Those inflicting the CBT may or may not be sadistic, but typically the giver is exerting dominance over the male receiver. Light to moderate CBT is not particularly sadistic; however, CBT is a dominant/submissive act between the giver/receiver.

Cock and Ball Torture can sometimes be related to the practice of chastity too (particularly with spiked cock cages).

In general the most sensitive male anatomy include the testes and the glans (head) of the penis. The shaft of the penis is relatively insensitive yet does have superficial blood vessels that can be ruptured resulting in mild bruising, which is relatively harmless and will fade in less than one week.

Dangerous activities within CBT consist of prolonged restriction of blood flow or compressing the testes against a hard surface or the pelvic bone. When done with sufficient force this can rupture the tunica albuginea, which is the outer fibrous covering of the testes. A force of >80 pounds per square inch (PSI) against a hard surface can rupture a testicle, causing permanent damage.

Collaring

Collaring is a formal step in a BDSM dynamic that makes said dynamic “official”. Typically marked by a ceremony, sometimes with other members of the kink community in attendance, other times in private. The collar is typically given by a Dominant person to a submissive person and is often placed on them by Dominant.

Collaring is an extremely intimate choice to make – sometimes even changing some parameters of the dynamic from how they were “pre-collaring”. For some people collaring is similar to a marriage vow.

Consensual Non-Consent

A form of consent where the people participating agree and consent to that certain words are to be ignored, or that there is no form of consent needed for activities during a scene. Often abbreviated to CNC.

In some forms of CNC, safety measures like safe words are not in place. While limits may still be set beforehand, vocal cues, like a “no”, “stop”, or even “red”, may be ignored, usually because the other person wants to use them to role play and desires them to be ignored. CNC is often seen as playing with a safe situation that a person may not fully desire or want, but still wants to have the experience of, and has consented to exploring it with the person / people involved.

People may use CNC to re-live trauma experiences in an environment where they have made the choice to experience it or that still allows them a way to get out of the situation in a safe manner. This triggering can result in negative scenarios, but this will have to be discussed and prepared beforehand with the people involved.

CNC in a crowd – Note that CNC play in public places can be problematic, as bystanders may not be aware of the dynamic and the CNC that has been agreed upon. As it can look a lot like a consent violation, it can also trigger people that have experiences with consent violations or similar ‘real’ scenarios. Because of that many people that have these scenes in public will do this in a controlled manner where everyone is aware of the situation and has been informed about the agreement before the scene begins.

Cuckolding

A form of humiliation or voyeuristic play where a cuckold or cuckquean is allowing their partner to engage in sexual activities with another person. Sometimes the concept is that the other person takes on the role of a Bull or a Cuckcake. The focus of the play often tends to be that the other person is more sexually potent than the cuckold or cuckquean but it can also just be for the voyeuristic and exhibitionistic pleasure of all parties.

The sexual engagement of the Cuckoldress or partner of the cuckold / cuckquean usually happens with the knowledge of all parties, but may not necessarily include all people in the sexual activity itself. There are gentle variations that have the cuckold or cuckquean just being aware of the sexual activity taking place. Often the cuckold or cuckquean is actively humiliated by the people engaging in the sexual acts this can include things like requiring them to cleanup bodily fluids after the sexual act is finished.

Degradation

Degradation can come in many forms, the most common form is often verbal – mockery, insults, and belittlement. Degrading can also take physical forms such as spitting, slapping, spanking, being ejaculated on, or urinating on the submissive partner.

Denim Play

Denim play (sometimes referred to as Denimatrix play when performed by a female presenting person) is play that focuses on or fetishizes denim clothing. Usually the denim clothing is worn by a Dominant. Often the Dominant will be dressed in tight jeans, either in tight crotchless jeans or just tight skinny jeans, which are often worn without underwear and with no belt.

Other forms of denim clothing may also be used such as a denim jacket.

The denim wearing dominant often engages in play such as facesitting and smothering their partner so that the denim is pressed up against them. Often they enjoy their partner’s struggles. Getting cum stains or other bodily fluids on denim clothing is seen as a bonus and seeing a crotch bulge or a penis sticking out of a jeans’ zipper in Dominants who have a penis is often considered very arousing.

The name denimatrix was also used by a City British wrestling promotor who was described as ‘seductive’ and dressed in skin tight denim.

Discipline

One of the core principles of BDSM as paired with Bondage. The ‘D’ in BDSM stands for Discipline as well as Dominance.

A form of role play where the participants agree on rules and are abiding by these rules. If rules are broken the person being the Top-type role will Discipline the Bottom-type role. The Discipline may come in the form of physical or mental punishment and may range from Impact Play to not allowing the Bottom role to have an orgasm.

Generally speaking the punishment is not the thing that is desired, it is the constant reminder of structure and rules that is the central aim of this kind of play.

Dominance

One of the core principles of BDSM as an opposite to submission. The D in BDSM stands for Dominance as well as Discipline.

A form of mental/role play where the person dominates the other party. Related roles include Domina, Dominant and Domme but more roles can include forms of dominance.

The level of dominance can change greatly between dynamics, roles like Master or Mistress are a different kind of dominance than other roles like Mommy or Daddy. However all are valid the the dynamic that people choose to be in.

Dollification

Dollification is the process of transforming someone into a “Doll.” These changes can be mental or physical and often, but not always, are achieved through domination using humiliation, objectification, degradation, and/or dehumanization.

Transformation can include physical changes such as (but are not limited to):

• Cosmetic procedures to permanently or semi-permanently alter the doll’s body such as implants and rhinoplasty (permanent alterations) or “permanent” makeup, lip and cheek fillers (semi-permanent alternations).
• Outfit changes such as costumes or latex suits
• Makeup application
• Liquid latex being used to coat the body

A doll’s mind may also be altered with the use of hypnosis, or classical conditioning.

Doll play can involve playing with the doll while they hold the position they’re placed in until moved and quiet, aka minimize breath sounds, regardless of how their body is being played with.

Dolls can have any body type, but some people may feel more like a doll because of their body shape.

Dronification

Dronification is a process where a person will transform into a drone that is detached from the world around them and perform functions as if they are a machine. These functions are often kink and sex related and are usually part of objectification as drones are usually looking to become an object in as many ways as possible. The application of hypnosis can often part of the drone creation process. It is also not uncommon that drones have a specific drone name or “designation.”

A drone is likely to wear tight full body-covering garments, often made out of latex, with a mask to detach themselves from the current situation. The masks are often modified gas masks so they do not show the drone’s expressions. The latex clothing is tight in order to help contain the drone and alter the sensations they feel in order to match their state of mind. The drone can wear other clothing over their drone suit and earmuffs are often included in order to exclude the drone from their surroundings even more. Their look can be very futuristic, similar to cyberpunk, and are sometimes inspired by Japanese manga.

People who undergo dronification are likely to be a submissive type person in a dynamic with a dominant type person. They are there to serve in a similar way as a slave or a fuckdoll.

Dronification may be considered a similar role to dollification but the setting, feel and implementation are very different.

Electro Play

This type of play includes devices that use electricity on the body of the recipient to create a wide range of sensations starting from gentle buzzing, through to exciting prickles or even up to pain play. This play also has a fear component (playing with fear of the electricity) and so can have both a physical and mental aspect for some people. Others simply love the wild sensations that can be passed through body parts like their genitals!

Common devices used are electrical boxes made for the purpose (estim), Violet wands, medical e-stim devices and zappers/tasers. People also sometimes use self made devices such as converted electrical fly swatters.

Generally these devices are low-current, high-voltage in their setup and can be adjusted to suit individual requirements and moods. There are still risks involved as playing with electricity is not 100% safe – devices can malfunction, be incorrectly calibrated or must be applied in certain ways in order to be safe. For example medical e-stim devices send electricity between two points so placing vital organs in between those points is to be avoided.

Estim above the waist line is not recommended for the inexperienced.

Energy Play

A form of play that can use methods and techniques from Tai chi, Neotantra, Meditation, Reiki and other spiritual sources to create and manipulate sensations between participants. It is usually practiced with two or more people, although larger group and solo play is also practiced.

With many different approaches this type of play is not always as easy to understand, but the root principles tend to be universal. It uses the internal ‘life energy’ of participants to manipulate their own energy and potentially also the energy of others. This energy can than be used to enhance emotions, create sensations and even generate energetic orgasms.

Facesitting

The act of one partner sitting on the face of the other. This is a form of breath play.

Fear Play

A form of mental play where participants consent to being scared by physical or mental threats. Sometimes part of discipline or a power exchange geared towards the recipient being scared of potential punishment.

For some people there can be pleasure derived from imminent threat, but also from lingering threat. For the latter this is often played out over longer periods of time as a feeling of fear slowly builds within the dynamic. For many fear play is a way to experience the rush of adrenaline and other hormones associated with fear, without having to experience this feat without consent.

Fear play can also be part of using impact implements where the anticipation of impact can cause a sense of fear. Other types of play like knife play, needle play and electro play can have a fear element as part of the scene.

Feminization

Feminization is a form of play where someone who typically doesn’t express or appear feminine plays in a feminine gender expression. Sometimes, someone else will feminize them during play. Other times, people will feminize themselves.

The process of feminization could include shaving off body hair, applying makeup, choosing cute lingerie or an apron to wear, etc. but can vary in form or execution just as well.

Some people feminize as an early-transition method to explore their gender identity, while others are comfortable in their cisgender identity and simply like to be feminized for sexual pleasure or humiliation.

Fire Play

Fire play involves using real fire, often on or near a partner. It is commonly combined with sensory, impact and fear play.

Types of Play

• Impact: Often coming in the form of a flogger that is drenched in flammable liquid and set on fire while flogging a person, this can also be done with single tail whips.
• Sensation: Using Nitrocellulose (commonly known as flash cotton) to place fire on the body. Sometimes this is also done with a flammable liquid that burns quickly and at a lower temperature than other fuels (like certain dilutions of alcohol) in combination with a lower layer of isothermal gel.
• Wax: In some cases wax play can also be considered fire play when the flame of the candle is used for other things besides melting the wax.
• Performance: Fire play is often performed as a show during BDSM & fetish parties. There are restrictions in where things can be performed safely and in many venues it’s advised to check if the owner is okay with the fire risk.

Safety – Fire play carries a risk of burns, unintended fires, damage to property and smoke or fume inhalation. So when attempting to do fire play please make sure to have proper fire safety education and preparation.

Humiliation

Humiliation in BDSM relationships refers to a consensual practice where one or more individuals derive pleasure or gratification from the experience of being humiliated or humiliating others within the boundaries of their established power dynamics and negotiated limits. It is important to emphasize that BDSM activities, including humiliation, are built upon principles of consent, trust, and communication.

Humiliation can take various forms and can be tailored to the specific desires and boundaries of the participants involved. Some common aspects of humiliation in BDSM may include verbal degradation, such as name-calling or derogatory language, physical acts like spanking or slapping, or engaging in role-playing scenarios that involve power imbalances or embarrassing situations.

In a BDSM context, humiliation serves as a tool to explore power dynamics, stimulate intense emotions, and enhance the overall sexual or psychological experience for the participants. It may be enjoyed by both the dominant (top) and the submissive (bottom) partners, as it can intensify their sense of submission or dominance and create a heightened sense of vulnerability or control.

It is crucial to note that all activities within a BDSM relationship must be fully consensual and negotiated beforehand. This involves clear communication, establishing boundaries, and implementing safewords or other signals to ensure that everyone involved feels safe and comfortable during the scene. It is also important to engage in aftercare, which involves providing support and reassurance to the participants after the scene to help them process their emotions and return to a state of emotional well-being.

BDSM practices, including humiliation, can be highly subjective and vary greatly from person to person. It is essential for individuals interested in exploring these dynamics to engage in open and honest communication, educate themselves on consent and safety, and consider seeking guidance from experienced individuals or resources within the BDSM community.

Hypnosis

A subset of mental play, Hypnosis leverages different techniques to achieve sensations and behaviors within the recipient controlled by the person applying the hypnosis-techniques.

With different types of hypnosis comes also different kinds of play and different kinds of connections. Most kinds of hypnosis play use imprinting techniques to condition a subject into being susceptible to suggestions. These can range from certain trigger words resulting in sensations or emotions for the subject and inducing a trance in the subject. Hypnosis can therefore be used for a wide range of things including fear play, sensation play, Bondage and Submission.

In some ways Hypnosis can be very similar to or connected with Energy Play as it uses common techniques to achieve certain things.

Hypnotic Induction and Consent – Everyone CAN go into trance. We all do it, all the time. A hypnotic trance is a state of focused attention. It is similar to being “off with the fairies/glazed over/zoned out/in the zone”. The state of mind you can experience in trance is similar to what you might get during the last 10 minutes of a yoga class when you’re relaxing and the instructor is talking and guiding you into a deeply relaxed state that’s like sleep but not sleep.

The state of trance is different for different people on different days. It is not a singular experience that every experiences the same way. Think of it as a whole range of possibility. At one end of that range is a ‘light trance’ where you’re calm and relaxed but can hear everything the hypnotist says, there can be an awareness of the wider environment as well as an awareness of the inner environment (like thoughts and feelings).

At the other end of the scale is a ‘deep trance’ where the subject is off with the fairies. In this state they may have no awareness of what is being said or how they feel or what they think. They may look like they are asleep but while being in a deep trance trance looks like sleep they are two very different and distinct states.

For hypnotic suggestions to have the desired effect it is not always essential to be in any particular depth of trance. Certain depths may make it easier or harder for certain techniques to be used effectively but everyone is different and what might be ideal for one person may not be for another.

For hypnosis to work it needs many variables lining up. It will have to be someone the hypnotic subject is happy and comfortable with, the hypnotist will need to be able to talk in the right way and use the right words which have been calibrated to the hypnotic subject, it will need to be the right time and the right location. These are the main variables but there are others that could have an impact on the success of the session. If all the variables align then there is the potential for a great experience.

An inexperienced hypnotist will often blame their subject if trance doesn’t happen. A poor workman always blames his tools!

The enthusiastic participation and consent of the subject is a decisive factor in the process. There is a misconception that you can’t be hypnotised against your will. That is true if you know you are being hypnotised but if you don’t know you are being hypnotised it is hard to resist if someone is using ‘conversational hypnosis’. Many of the language patterns used in conversational hypnosis are also used in the advertising and marketing industries and for good reason. Language can be very persuasive and you don’t have to be in a stereotypical hypnotic trance in order to be persuaded into doing something that you might not otherwise do.

Depending on how good the hypnotist is, how suggestible the hypnotic subject is, what suggestions they are given the subject may be able to withdraw consent part way through a session or they may not. A good hypnotist will ensure that the subject has a get out of jail free card when it comes to any part of the session they might be struggling with and so they can withdraw consent if they wish. It is therefore important to have a very extensive consent conversation before beginning any form of induction with hypnosis.

Often the moment a subject stops wanting something, everything in that hypnotic state is broken and no longer ‘works’.

For some people though there is a risk that, once the conditioning is in place, they will be more susceptible to suggestions and may become non-verbal or otherwise unable to easily withdraw consent. It is therefore important to have a very extensive consent conversation before beginning any form of induction with hypnosis.

Many subjects may find it helpful to practice meditation first as the feeling is very similar to hypnosis (except with a person controlling them).

Impact Play

A form of play involving hitting someone, usually with a Top hitting a Bottom. This term is mostly used as a collection for different kinds of more specific play that may or may not include a dynamic, but often are a play type between a Masochist and a Sadist.

Knife Play

An activity where a knife is dragged over the body of a recipient. The intensity of this type of play is connected to fear play and it can result in cuts in clothing or on the surface of the skin.

Often a more dull blade is used so that the skin is not perforated but it still gives a scratching or cutting sensation. Sometimes people will use a two sided blade with one sharp and one dull side to manipulate a recipient to believe they are cut with a sharp knife when the sharp side was only actually used for demonstration.

Maintenance Spanking

Regular spanking to impress authority and instil obedience instead of punishing a specific behaviour.

Masochism

One of the core principles of BDSM as an opposite to Sadism. The M in BDSM stands for Masochism.

It’s an umbrella term for all forms of play that result in a person receiving pain and perceiving that as pleasurable or arousing. People who enjoy receiving pain are often known as Masochists or algophiles.

In the 1800s Leopold von Sacher-Masoch wrote novels containing his masochistic fantasies and it is from his surname that we get term Masochism.

Krafft Ebing helped to popularise the term when he wrote about Masochism in his 1886 work on sexual psychopathy called Psychopthia Sexualis.

Medical Play

Medical play is a form of role play involving medical examinations and procedures in a kink setting. Often medical devices are used and the setting is a fantasy version of what a medical environment could look like.

This play explores the power dynamic between a patient and a medical professional and the vulnerability the patient will need to place themselves in to be examined or to have medical procedures done. The setting and tools really help this role play, but also things like sensory play, exposure and humiliation can be part of the dynamic.

A subset of medical play includes dental fetish where the medical play is specifically oriented towards dental care.

Common Tools & Equipment

A gynecology chair is commonly used for the patient to have their legs fixated open, sometimes combined with bondage.

Tools like the speculum, reflex hammers, stethoscope and medical tuning forks may be used.

As the setting is so important, the medical professional in the role play may also dress up accordingly (in either a realistic or kinky way) and use things like medical gloves to make it feel more authentic. Examinations with these gloves can be intimate but feel distant at the same time due to the gloves being a barrier between skin on skin contact.

Needle Play

Needle play is a form of play involving the use of needles to create temporary piercings in the body. Needles can be used as part of S/M play (i.e. to deliver/receive pain), for their aesthetic value or for sensual play. People often use needles to create patterns on the skin and as a form of medical play.

Needle play is practised with caution and requires knowledge about the use of needles, sterilisation, hygiene and safety. It is often considered to be as much of a risk to the top as it is to the bottom due to the risk of blood borne pathogens. Generally, medical needles are used that are categorized by various thicknesses (known as gauges) and lengths. Other piercing objects may also be used such as sterile skin staplers (typically used to close wounds in medical care).

Neotantra

Neotantra, sometimes referred to as tantric sexuality, is a sacred sexuality practice that prioritizes presence, mindfulness, and connection over orgasm and physical release. Practices common to Neotantra include eye gazing, mindful breathing, conscious touch, energy play, delayed orgasm, and certain positions that help align partners’ chakras (e.g., Yab Yum position).

NOTE: When talking about forms of sacred sex, the term Neotantra (not Tantra) is often the preferred term. Tantra is considered to be a collection of spiritual practices that come from Hinduism and Buddhism, and is much more than just sacred sex. To use the term Tantra instead of Neotantra (i.e., sacred sex) may be considered a form of cultural appropriation. This also includes referring to oneself as a Tantrika or Tantra practitioner as this term belongs to people of Indian or Southeast Asian ancestry who have studied these spiritual practices.

One-sided Nudity

Play where the dominant partner is clothed but the submissive partner is naked. The vulnerability felt by a submissive being naked while their partner is clothed can create or enhance a power dynamic.

This play is sometimes abbreviated to CFNM (Clothed Female, Naked/Nude Male) and CMNF (Clothed Male, Naked/Nude Female).

Penis Shrinking

This is the kink activity of using compressive chastity or other devices to reduce the apparent length of the penis. This can be connected to Humiliation, Castration Play or Feminization.

Pet Play

An umbrella term for a collection of types of play between a Handler and any form of pet. The types of pets that you could find include kitten, piggy, pony and pup roles. These roles have different types of specific play styles.

In general the interaction between a Handler or pet “caretaker” and a pet is one where the handler supports the pet with their experiences being their preferred type of pet. This can include activities like petting, feeding and dressing. Sometimes humiliation or discipline can be part of the activities, but this is not always the case. Many Handlers and pets have a power dynamic that is softer and more supporting or nurturing in nature.

This can also be between multiple “pets,” usually seen as a sort of playdate.

Play Fighting

A playful form of fighting between two or more participants. Generally there is explicit content of what is allowed or not allowed during the “fight” negotiated before hand between people. This may include: scratching, biting, restraining holds, choking / breath play, pinching, grabbing of genitals, slapping, punching, hair pulling and many other possible ways to hurt and deter the other participant(s) to let go or give up.

Often the objective of this play is to make the other submit or surrender, however many do this for the enjoyment of the act of fighting and not to have the other person submit as quickly as possible. The submission or surrender may be caused by the exhaustion of a participant rather than through force, injury or something else.

Plushophilia

Plushophilia is the deep love, admiration, or sexual attraction to plushies (stuffed animals). Even though it can be considered a kink, depending how people view their plushies individually could put them into different categories.

Plushie Preference:

1. A person who has an attraction to plushies in romantic way, but not sexually could be classified under romantic orientation.
2. A person who just collects plushies wouldn’t be classified as anything but a collector.
3. A person who may have a sexual preference for plushies could fall under sex toys, kink, or sexual preference

All these things are dependent on how a person views their plushies. Plushies in a sexual sense can be cuddled while masturbating, rubbed on the genitals for external pleasure, or modded with an SPH (strategically placed hole), SPA (strategically placed appendage) or multiple SPH’s.

Types of Plushies Modifications:

Basic SPH: The most basic SPH is a hole that can be cut into the plushie for penetration purposes.

SPH Sleeve: This type of SPH is a sleeve sewn into the plushie usually made of fabric, vinyl, or latex that allows the person penetrate the plushie. Some of these can actually be removed for cleaning and maintenance.

SPH Insert Sleeve: These are a more permanent fixture placed into the plushie that allow a toy such as a Fleshlight to be inserted into the plushie to be used. These kind of SPH’s can be exposed or hidden by a zipper when not in use.

SPA (strap on): This is the easiest way to add an SPA (strategically placed appendage) to a plushie. The user just uses a strap-on dildo to the plushie so that plushie can penetrate said user.

SPA (integrated fabric): These type of SPA’s are designed to be more cosmetic than functional. They allow the plushie look more realistic and aroused sexually.

SPAID: (strategically placed appendage with integrated dildo). These types of SPA’s are dildos that are integrated into a sheath on the plushie. This is a much more complex version of the strap-on method. When not in use, the dildo can be pushed into the plushie to be hidden.

Power Exchange

The assigning of power or control over one person to another (or others). This is consensual and sometimes seen as a ‘gift’ from the person giving up their power e.g. from a submissive partner to a dominant partner.

24/7 Power Exchange: This is a dynamic where power exchange is always or nearly always present in some form between people during their daily lives. This is often seen between master and slave dynamics.

Authority Transfer: Within Core BDSM Authority Transfer or Power Exchange has a different meaning to the terms used by the kink community. An authority transfer is where a slave or submissive irrevocably transfers all of their agency to their Dominant or Master. Consent is still given to the AT but consent is not renegotiated for each activity.

In a Total authority Transfer or Total Power Exchange in Core BDSM there are no areas where the submissive (slave) retains their agency, or such areas are so irrelevant not to count. The slave is considered to be the property of their Dominant who assumes the title of Master. This process is consensual and has nothing to do with historical slavery. Once consent to the TAT is given, withdrawing consent will break the dynamic, similar to ending a marriage.

Role Play

Role play is an umbrella term for types of fantasy play that focuses on the dynamic between the participants in a fictional scenario. The roles being played and the scenarios are highly diverse and range from pretend scenarios all the way to enacting real life situations. Often there is a power imbalance that is played out these kinds of scenarios between a Bottom and Top.

In types of role play include but are not limited to:

• Doctor or nurse / patient
• Teacher / student
• Police officer / criminal
• Boss / employee
• Client / stripper or sex worker
• Handyman / housewife
• Photographer / model
• Homeowner / maid
• Daddy or Mommy / little
• Human / Animal

In more extreme cases CNC (Consensual Non-Consent), rape play, abduction play and other scenarios that look for the edge can be considered role play. However understandably there are a lot more risks involved there. Role play is not always super serious – the limit is your imagination and your ability to manage your limits and consent well.

Rough Body Play

Similar to Play Fighting but differs in that the Top and the Bottom tend to have more of a power exchange dynamic as the Bottom will not actively work against this play happening and behave like a recipient to the activity instead of a very active participant.

Often connected to Primal roles, common applications include punching, kicking, holds, Breath Play, hair pulling and other forms of generally rough activities. This kind of play can include sexual activity, but is sometimes also combined with Rope Bondage or other forms of play where the recipient tends to be moved around and controlled by the applicant.

Sadism

One of the core principles of BDSM as an opposite to Masochism. The S in BDSM stands for Sadism as well as submission.

It’s an umbrella term for all forms of play that involve a person giving pain to someone and perceiving that act as pleasurable or arousing. People who enjoy giving pain are often known as Sadists.

Sadomasochism

A combination of both Sadism and Masochism within BDSM.

With both giving and receiving pain as a form of preferred play by a Sadomasochist this can be done at the same time, in turn or separately in different sessions. Common among people that Switch and practiced in a wide variety of scenarios. It is less often done by a person to one’s self but some people do include this practice.

Scene

A scene is a session of BDSM or Kink activities usually negotiated with a partner in advance where as ‘the scene’ is often a term used to refer to the BDSM or Kink community / lifestyle as a whole.

Scene Categories: A scene typically falls into two categories:

• Public Scene: done in a consenting public area, like a dungeon, playhouse, or at a play party.
• Private Scene: done in a private area with only those involved in the scene (and possibly with consenting spectators).

Recommended Negotiations:

• Limits – Both soft and hard limits. What you are eager to do; what you are willing to try; what you will never do.
• Safewords – This may be a specified word or phrase, or it may be a “safeword system” such as a pain number scale, or the red-light system.
• Health – Discuss preexisting health conditions, including ones that might not seem important like allergies or low blood sugar tendencies. Also, daily health, like headaches, and body aches. Also current mental health states like anxiety or nervousness.
• Expectations – What you expect to happen, and what you don’t want to happen within the context of the scene.
• Wants & Needs – What you want to get from the scene, and what you need to get from the scene (physically, emotionally, etc.)
• Kinks – What will be (or might be) included in the scene. This may include discussion of toys, implements, furniture, and/or activities.
• Sexual Contact – Whether sexual contact will be part of the scene or not. Acceptable levels of nudity and who controls it. If play can include genital areas or not (for example, impact play or wax play on the genitalia). Sexual intercourse, and corresponding safety precautions.
• Dates – Both arrival at and departure from the scenario.
• Locations – Not only where the scene will take place, but also potential prior meet-ups; especially when negotiating with a stranger for a private scene.
• Time – A minimum and maximum duration for the scene.

Additional Recommendations:

• Safe Call – A person to whom you give the information about your upcoming scene. Include who you are meeting, where you are going, what time it is happening, and when you should be back.
• First Aid Kit – From bandaids and ointments for impact play and knife play, to EMT scissors for bondage play and breath play.
• Snacks & Water – Stay hydrated and keep that blood-pressure regulated. Do not scene on a full stomach.
• Hygiene – Make sure you are clean before the scene. This includes everything being free from offending body odor to ensuring no dirt or bacteria might cause an infection to being tested for STIs and other infectious diseases. Also, consider the negotiated scene. If engaging in fire play, make sure no lotions, perfumes, hair spray, or any other flammable products are on the body before the scene.
• Escape Plan – Always leave a way of escape, or have a 3rd person (a “Spotter”) on hand who can release the restrained person in case the Dom becomes incapacitated (faint / seizure / other).

Always always always vet your scene partner thoroughly before agreeing to do a scene. Be safe, protect yourself, negotiate, set up a safe call, and have fun!

Sacred Play

Sacred Play is a form of play based on a spiritual connection between partners. It is not just a D/s dynamic, but rather fluid, often combining aspects of protocol, psychological play, and worship. For many the goal is to treat/be treated as a divinity or deity, setting up rules and rites for their worshippers to follow, or simply reveling in the adoration of others.

Sensory Play

An umbrella term commonly used for more gentle play types that focus on subtle sensations or the taking away of senses from a Bottom. These usually involve deprivation, the overloading of senses or a combination of the two used in tandem to enhance one with the other.

Innovation is common within sensory play – food utensils, tuning forks, music instruments and all sorts of other items that cause unique sensations can be used in this kind of play.

Sensory deprivation

This is where the recipient has senses taken away. Commonly this is done with blindfolds and headphones, but also can include vacuum beds, restraints like straitjackets or other methods to reduce the senses the recipient can use.

Sensory overload

This is where extra sensations are added to create an overwhelming sensation. Commonly this is done with things like ice-cubes over the skin, feathers and other soft sensations or by playing with sound, smell and taste. For some people sensory overload creates a place of calmness.

Slave Training

An umbrella term that refers to Master and slave roles and/or social contracts between other dynamics within BDSM where there are activities or processes related to someone changing from a non-slave role to the slave role. This can have elements of group initiation around it. It can also form a kind of therapy, processing topics such as shame and natal alienation. This family of activities is distinct from Collaring, where a relationship is recognized, and instead tends to represent a period of time akin to courtship in that relationship’s progression.

Spanking

The act of hitting a partner either with hands or implements. Strikes are usually applied to the buttocks region. Can be for fun or punishment. Receiving roles include but are not limited to Bottoms, Masochists and submissive types.

Submission

One of the core principles of BDSM as an opposite to Dominance. The S in BDSM stands for submission as well as sadomasochism.

A form of mental/role play where the person submits to the other party. The role most commonly associated with this is submissive, but more roles can include forms of submission to the partner(s) of this type of play.

The level of submission can change greatly between dynamics as a slave is a different kind of submission than other. However all are valid the the dynamic that people choose to be in.

Trampling

Walking over someone’s body in barefeet or with shoes (often high heels). Some people just want to feel the pressure, some like to feel the pain. Often enjoyed by people in the foot lover scene who are aroused by or enjoy feet.

Urine Play

“Urine play,” also known as “watersports” or “golden showers,” is a sexual practice that involves incorporating urine into sexual activities or fantasies. For some people it can be a form of power exchange or a fetish but some individuals simply derive pleasure or excitement from the act of urination or from being urinated on by a partner.

Urine play can take various forms, ranging from simply observing or experiencing the sensation of urinating on oneself or others, to drinking or ingesting urine, or incorporating it into other sexual acts. It is important to note that engaging in urine play requires full and informed consent from all participants.

When participating in urine play, it is crucial to prioritize safety and hygiene. Precautions should be taken to minimize the risk of transmitting infections or diseases, such as ensuring both partners have good urinary health and avoiding contact with mucous membranes or open wounds.

Voyeurism

An activity where sexual pleasure is gained from watching others when they are engaged in a sexual act, kink activity or are nude. A person who enjoys this is often known as a voyeur.

Wax Play

A form of play that uses candles or heated pots containing wax crystals. The recipient(s) of this type of play will have the hot wax dripped on their body by the applicant(s).

Commonly the recipient of wax play will be in a fairly stationary position so that the wax can drip in positions on the body as intended by the applicant. The type of wax used is carefully considered to ensure a body safe melting temperature. The height the wax drops from is also considered so that it can cool down enough to be body safe. There is a potential for skin burns with this play as melted wax can be very hot. Common, and safer, materials used for wax play include soy wax due to it’s lower melting point.

Wax play is sometimes combined with other forms of play, like Rope Bondage. Especially different styles of Japanese Bondage which are known to incorporate wax and candles in their ropes as part of the tradition.