Teds Talk, A Plush Perspective On Consent
I am so glad to be back with you for another Teds’ Talk! Last time, I told you about my not-so-great adventure with Percy the unicorn and Lilly Leap the frog. Well, let me tell you, it was BIG twouble! I had to eat broccoli for dinner and sit in the corner for what felt like FOREVER. All this happened because I got carried away and forgot something super duper important: consent!
Now, consent is a people word that means everyone involved gets to say “yes” or “no” to something, and they really, really mean it. It is like when you and your stuffed friends decide to play a game together. If one of you does not want to play, it is important to listen to and respect that. In the world of BDSM and kink, where things can get a little spicy, consent is extra important because everyone needs to feel safe and happy. If someone feels pressured or uncomfortable, it can ruin the fun, just like I ruined the ride for Percy and Lilly.
So, here is a neat way to remember what consent looks like with the F.R.I.E.S. method. Let me break it down for you, and I will sprinkle in some cuddly examples. Just like how I love French fries with ketchup or vinegar on them, this method is something to savor!
* Freely-given: This means consent should be given without any pressure or sneaky tricks. Imagine Percy saying, “I will to take you for a ride!” and not because I pestered him until he gave in. That would not be fair!
* Revokable: Consent can be taken back at any time. Just like if Lilly decides she wants to stop riding Percy and wants to take a nap instead, she can say, “I am done riding!” And that is totally okay!
* Informed: Everyone should know what they are saying yes to. If I say, “Let’s play a game of dress-up,” it is important that my friends know what that involves so they can decide if they want to join in or not. It is like reading the game rules before playing!
* Enthusiastic: Consent should be excited and full of joy! If Percy is bouncing with joy and says, “Yes, let’s ride!” that means he is really in the mood to play. If he just shrugs, then I know he might not be so excited, and that is a signal to check in with him.
* Specific: Consent is not a blanket “yes” for everything. Just because Percy agrees to one ride does not mean he is ready to or wants to play wild rodeo unicorn! Each activity should be discussed and agreed upon separately, just like how each stuffie has their favorite games.
Now, let’s talk about limits, soft and hard. Limits are like friendly boundaries that help keep everyone safe and happy while playing.
* Hard limits: These are things that are an absolute no-no. It is like when I say I do not want to be dressed up as a clown. If someone insists, I will definitely feel uncomfortable and run away to my secret hiding spot, don’t tell anyone but it is under the bed! Hard limits must always be respected.
* Soft limits: These are things that someone might be hesitant about but could be open to exploring if they feel safe and supported. For example, Lilly might say, “I am not sure about jumping over Big Alphie, the elephant, but maybe if you help me practice and cheer me on, I might try when I am ready.” It is important to communicate openly about soft limits and respect them.
So, to tie everything together with my stylish bowtie, consent is the golden rule in any playful adventure, especially in BDSM and kink. It is essential for making sure everyone feels good, safe, and happy. Just like how I learned the hard way about respecting Percy’s and Lilly’s feelings, I don’t want any more broccoli, it is crucial to be aware of the F.R.I.E.S. method and understand limits. Remember, a fun and fulfilling experience happens when all friends feel included and respected.
Teds’ Tag-Along Thoughts:
Hi again, friends! Remember, consent is the cuddly foundation that keeps our connections strong and our experiences safe. It is crucial to communicate openly and respect one another’s boundaries, especially in adult relationships. Just like I learned from my mishap with Percy and Lilly, understanding and honoring consent enriches every experience and keeps us safter, making it more enjoyable for everyone. So, let us snuggle up and think about our own experiences with consent! What have you learned about consent and making a nice, soft space where everyone feels comfy and cared for? Have you ever had to put your paw down and say this is not for me?
Until next time, keep those plushie hearts open and those lines of communication clear!
Stay kinky and kozy,
❤Teds❤