Ugh, someone said I have sub frenzy like it’s a disease? Isn’t that just being excited to explore stuff?

Thank you for the question and while you are correct, sub frenzy is not a ‘disease’, it should concern you. Sub-frenzy is a term that describes a phase where individuals, whether new or experienced in BDSM, experience intense eagerness to explore and enjoy. This enthusiasm can lead to a rush to engage in activities without adequate preparation, education, or consideration of safety measures. In other words, you might be at risk of putting yourself in a dangerous situation to explore/enjoy something kinktastic and the person or people who have brought it up are concerned for you.

The concern around sub-frenzy stems from the potential for individuals to engage in risky behaviors. In their eagerness, people tend to overlook crucial aspects such as negotiation of boundaries, understanding of risks involved in activities, and ensuring consent is fully informed and ongoing. The biggest risk for those who allow their frenzy into the driver’s seat is they choose a partner(s)/playmate(s) of convenience over carefully vetted ones which puts them at high risk of engaging with an abusive twattwaffle which increases the likelihood of physical harm, emotional distress, or both.

Being excited, eager, and ready to explore is not a negative and signifies a positive phase of self-discovery, however, it requires careful management. To navigate sub-frenzy or just excited and ready to explore safely and responsibly, consider the following tips:

Educate yourself thoroughly about BDSM, safety protocols, and the importance of consent.

Understand the risks associated with different activities before engaging in them.

Start slowly and resist the urge to dive headfirst into intense scenes and new experiences, especially with those you do not know extremely well. Begin with simpler activities and gradually increase complexity as you gain experience and confidence, while only engaging in these with trusted friends/partner(s).

Consent must be ongoing and enthusiastic throughout the interaction.

Set clear boundaries and communicate them effectively to your partner(s). Respect your limits and insist on their respect from others.

Establish and agree upon safe words or signals before beginning any scene. These are crucial for communicating discomfort or the need to stop immediately.

Practice aftercare consistently after BDSM activities to promote emotional and physical well-being. Plan and provide aftercare rituals that help you and your partner(s) transition back to normalcy.

Seek guidance from experienced members of the community or mentors who can provide support during your exploration. Their insights can help you navigate challenges and avoid pitfalls.

Educate yourself about the physical and emotional risks associated with different activities. Understanding these risks allows you to make informed decisions and take necessary precautions.

Take breaks between scenes or activities to process and reflect on your experiences. Evaluating your feelings ensures you are comfortable continuing and promotes emotional well-being.

Prioritize self-care by attending to your physical and emotional needs. Engage in activities that help you relax, recharge, and maintain a healthy balance between BDSM exploration and everyday life.

By integrating these tips into your exploration of sub-frenzy, you can approach your journey with a focus on safety, respect, and personal growth within the BDSM community. Responsible exploration not only enhances the experience but also fosters fulfilling connections with partners based on trust and mutual understanding. Finally, please remember that those who expressed concern about sub-frenzy were most likely not trying to be “big meanies” but saw concerning things so they spoke up to help keep you safe.

Thank you again for the question.